Ooh, Thank God For That

As you may have noticed, I’ve changed the colours and layout of the site. That green was just too bright on any other computer than mine, it seems, so apologies to those of you who tolerated it and welcome to those of you who have got through your migraines and decided to give it another go.

This “theme” (the preset layouts you can choose from) is a bit dull. I was aiming for tasteful - although sometimes I suspect the two words are pretty much interchangeable. Anyway, I haven’t got the time or energy at the moment to learn the html and do it all myself. That’s been added to the list of things to do when I retire (below “Try the cowboy-style riding again” but above “Do some ironing”).*

Anyway, it’s Bank Holiday Monday (notice how I resist the urge to shout, “Pah! Holiday for SOME!”) and naturally it’s bucketing down. But, strangely, I feel quite sorted and am allowing myself an afternoon off from the field/allotment/shed. See how quickly things start to slide? The framework of the fruit cage is up (It’s huge! The neighbours are looking forward to a barn-raising), the netting should be here on Tuesday and then I can finally – finally! – plant the last few things out.

All in time to start thinking about sowing some biennials for next year.

 

*Although obviously, if I do ever give up the day job, I won’t have a pension so will have to see my days out behind the “old, mentally-disturbed, or otherwise unemployable but statutorily required, six items or less (sic) if you want to get out before closing time” till at B&Q.

Me Against The Animal Kingdom

Well, the posts for the netting are going in on Thursday, and the crows will be defeated. Ha!

So of course today I found a place where the pea netting I use for support had been munched through, which means a rabbit has got in.

Make your bloody minds up! It’s like they’re taking turns to thwart me. I’ve never been an animal lover*, so could this be payback time? If so, I’m sorry!! Just leave me alone to grow a few flowers! Is that too much to ask?

On a more positive note, I started the mower today! I am invincible!  (You listening, rabbits?)

By the way, when I look at this site on some computers it’s a hideous bright green, but on mine it’s a much nicer olivey colour. What’s the verdict? Leave me your comments, please. 

*The lovely Hercules excepted – he was a dingo, but soft as anything and with a marked preference for broccoli over babies.

 

 

 

The Birds! The Birds!

This was me at the flower field at the weekend. Well, all right, it would have been had I got there early enough to actually witness the devastation wreaked by those bloody crows! The entire row of Honesty plants, first sown last summer and nurtured ever since, and the only things on the field to have reached the flowering stage, have been completely stripped. No flowers left, no side shoots, not even any leaves – just a long row of stalks sticking up from the ground.

Wise Uncle Gerald (brother of Wise Uncle George) says he has watched crows bouncing on the top of his fruit cage to stretch the netting until it’s saggy enough for them to reach the fruit below. And, of course, we’ve all seen those clips of crows using tools. My local posse have obviously expanded their capabilities to include mobiles. You know how you sometimes hear a bird imitating a mobile phone? That’s no bird call – they’re just getting a text. “Hey, get over here quick! The flowers are ready! You must try the pink - it has a wonderful raspberry aftertaste…”  

So… after much cursing, frustrated foot-stamping and a bit of a weep, I’ve decided I’m going to have to net the whole plot. It’s a big area (the irony of getting a field and then enclosing it has not passed me by) but, with the advice of WUGeorge, I’ve decided on what I think will be the cheapest and easiest way to do it. We’ll see.

In other news: I’ve ditched the idea of buying a petrol mower  (all available funds redirected to the netting project). The Kindly Smallholders, misguidedly as it turned out, lent me one of theirs yesterday. All my fears about not being strong enough to pull the starting handle proved true (Oh, the shame!) but  I hadn’t anticipated getting huge clumps of long grass and, at one point, a wooden stake (I know!) stuck in the blades as well!

Maybe the crows could give me some tool-using tips.

 

 

 

Don’t Panic!

 

It’s May – without any even remotely close competition the best month of the year. Everything’s starting to look gorgeous, each day something new appears and yet those long, sunny, flowery evenings are all still to come. As Monty Don once wrote, “When I die I’m going to May”. Sigh…

So why am I feeling so rubbish? My stomach’s in knots and every ten minutes I’m looking at my calendar of things to do just to confirm to myself that, yes, I am so far behind that there’s no real point going on. (With the flowers, that is – don’t worry, I’m not about to top myself.)

The new seedlings need to be potted on while those I sowed last autumn are on the patio wondering why they’re still in a small plastic pot when they’ve heard talk of a distant land where crumbly, unplanted compost stretches further than the eye can see…

My main priority at the moment though is the grass, at both the field and the allotment, which desperately needs cutting before the dandelions start chucking their seeds hither and thither in that wonder-of-nature way that seemed so miraculous when I learnt about it in school but is now, frankly, a pain in the arse. (And how come the crows, still merrily munching their way through the Honesty, aren’t remotely interested in the dandelion flowers?) Being a weedy townie I, natch, only have a plastic, electric Flymo-jobbie. I need a petrol mower, powerful enough to tackle the rough ground but lightweight enough for me to lift in and out of the van.  And then, of course, there’s starting it – what if I’m too weedy to pull the starting string thingy hard enough?

These are the things that keep me awake at night! (Yes, really.) Still, as Uncle George - maybe not as eloquent as Monty, but just as wise - says, everything catches up in May.

Let’s hope that includes me.